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Personal Growth

Personal Growth

Question To Answer

What does it look like now?

When parents are able to establish a working partnership that results in routine without conflict they and the children begin to experience relief, are able to heal and start to evolve. It is vital that mom and dad are able to communicate in a reasonable way, be flexible and gracious toward one another so that their children can move forward.

Free from the burden of a contentious relationship with the other parent, mom and dad can figure out what their new life will become and create new, more fulfilling relationships. And along with that reaffirm their bonds with their children and fully focus on the art of parenting.

This is important because while mom and dad have to forge new lives separate from one another, the children have to adapt to their new life in a separated family. Not only do they have to live and sleep in two different places, but they have to figure out how to balance their attention between their parents and most often figure out how to accept their new partners into their world. All while figuring out life like any other child.

It is a lot, and again highlights how crucial it is that their natural parents are able to work together amicably. Even if the separation goes as well as possible the children’s’ lives are still going to be a lot more complicated than children living in intact families.

When separations become acrimonious the focus almost always is on the inability of the parents to get along. What gets lost is how much this negatively impacts the children. For the benefit of the children, once they separate parents have to develop amicable working partnerships. If they do not, everyone gets stuck and is unable to move past the pain of the separation.

While the separation itself is traumatic, in doing what is best for the children parents give them, and themselves, the chance to grow and evolve into the next stages of their lives.

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Additional Information.

“All Pro Dad is on a mission to help you love and lead your family well. Be a hero to your kids.” Former NFL player and head coach Tony Dungy played a big role in promoting the startup of All Pro Dad. They do really awesome daily e-mails that are very positive and topical (you can adjust them as a single or married father) – you should consider signing up for them. (website)
I CAN DADS Coaching is a program designed to support fathers with their responsibilities in raising their children. The program covers eight segments in an interactive small group environment. Topics covered are the legacy you received and the legacy you want to pass on, character, emotions (anger, shame, guilt), I-nvolvement, C-onsistency, A-wareness, N-urturing, maturity, communications and more. We help fathers understand their role and the impact it has on their children. Introductory Video. Website.
This site is sponsored by Cordell & Cordell, a domestic litigation firm with offices throughout the country. Obviously, they hope to draw business to the firm. But this is a very well designed and operated site with lots of new material, including professionally produced videos, and relays everything in a positive tone. LOTS of quality information here. Ex. “Let it go; Carrying the Right Attitude Through Divorce. (website)
The Good Men Project “explores the world of manhood that reflects the multidimensionality of men.” The site generates a lot of new content that delves into all aspects of manhood, and you can sing up for daily e-mails. Ex. “Eight Tips for Becoming a Successful Single Dad.” (website)