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Talking to Children about Divorce

Talking to Children About Divorce

One of every two marriages today end in divorce. Many of which, unfortunately, involve children.

Some parents are devastated. Others are relieved by the divorce. But children, are invariably, frightened confused, and usually negatively impacted by the threats to their security and the upsets to their world.

Children often believe they may be responsible for the conflict between their parents. Many children assume the responsibility of trying to get their parents back together again, which causes them additional stress.

Parents, despite dealing with the emotional stresses and upsets caused by the divorce, have a prime responsibility to their children. This involves keeping them informed as to what is occurring, how it will involve them, and preparing them for what will occur in their lives.


It is very important that you resist the urge to be self-righteous or blame the other parent or try to win the child’s affections or favoritism by saying or doing things that may be alienating toward the other parent.


Each child has only one mother and father, and that mother and father will be the mother and father of that child for the rest of the child’s life. Like it or not, that is the reality for that child and for you as parents once that child has been born.

For the benefit of the child, and ultimately, the benefit of the parents, it is best that you take the high road and do everything you can to treat the other parent with respect. Your children are watching you, and they learn from what you do.

These articles provide advice on how to talk to your children about separation or divorce.

How to Talk to Your Children about Divorce

“Parents of young children should maintain routines, provide consistency in rules and expectations, and provide extra affection. Provide young children with repeated reassurances that the divorce is not their fault and that you love them.”

Age-by-Age Guide to What Children Understand About Divorce

An article in parents.com that provides advice on how to talk to your children about divorce specific to different developmental periods (birth to 18 months, 18 months to 3 years, 3 to 6 years and 6 to 11 years)..